A 12 day delay between optical and X-ray activity during outburst rise in a low-mass X-ray binary

X-ray transients, such as accreting neutron stars, periodically undergo outbursts, thought to be caused by a thermal-viscous instability in the accretion disk. Usually outbursts of accreting neutron stars are identified when the accretion disk has undergone an instability, and the persistent X-ray flux has risen to a threshold detectable by all sky monitors on X-ray space observatories. Here we present the earliest known combined optical, UV, and X-ray monitoring observations of the outburst onset of an accreting neutron star low mass X-ray binary system. We observed a delay of 12 days between the first increase in the optical $i'$-band magnitude (July 25) and the first X-ray detection with Swift/XRT and NICER (August 6), during the onset of the 2019 outburst of SAX J1808.4--3658, as well as a 2 day UV to X-ray delay. We present the multiwavelength observations that were obtained, discussing the theory of outbursts in X-ray transients, including the disk instability model, and the implications of the delay. This work is an important confirmation of the delay in optical to X-ray emission during the onset of outbursts in low mass X-ray binaries, which has only previously been measured with less sensitive all sky monitors. We find observational evidence that the outburst is triggered by ionisation of hydrogen in the disk, and propose that the presence of a significant amount of helium could play a role in the propagation of heating fronts, and delay the onset of outburst.